Welcome to my Blog

This is My Blog. The Content Of this Blog Changes, and WILL Change. It is about Everything that is Important to me! So, I hope you enjoy this brief glimpse in to my Brain!

HTML Marquees

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Authenticity Part Deux Or Being a Messy Christian

Its Kinda funny,not funny ha ha! but Ironically funny when there is something that i feel God is really trying to Really Get across to me. I see the particular Topic on TV, in things i read,My Pastor preaches a Sermon on it,and it just comes up over and over! That is how i know that is something God is Going "Psst, Check this out!"to me on. Being Authentic is one of those things.

Authenticity is define in the dictonary as : being true to ones personality, spirit, or character

There is other synonyms that are related:authentic:means being actually and exactly what is claimed.Implies being fully trustworthy as according with fact, it can also stress painstaking or faithful imitation of an original
implies good faith and sincerity of intention

My goal is to strive to be an Authentic Christian! I really Feel that If we are going to reach people, then they need to see that We are Authentic! People also want to see Christians that Are Not Trying to Act like they have it all together! that we are people that DO have issues and are Just like them, but, they have this AWESOME Relationship with Christ and BECAUSE of that relationship, they can Love others, and Get over these ISSUES, and Share that with other people, people that really truly NEED God's Grace and Forgiveness in their lives, Because We CANT do it outside of a Relationship with Christ. I have heard the term of " Messy Christianity" and That is SO what the cry of my Heart is . To be a Messy Christian. Jesus Died FOR EVERYONE! He wants ALL to be saved, and come to repentance. Not Just people that think they have it all together,and have no issues! EVERYONE! There is a Book called
Messy Spirituality by a Person called Mike Yaconelli if you want to check this out more!
He talks about What i am talking about! If People see us being Real about ourselves, and our Issues and see us loving them and each other in a NON-judgmental way, I think that is something that will DO AMAZING things for the Kingdom!
There is Other Bloggers that Are all about this! Here!Ragamuffinsoul.com
I love This GUYS Blog!
Him and some other Christian Bloggers
flowerdust.com and Prodigal Jon

They going to be having a Conference type meeting that is Sponsered by Catalyst, called "off the Blog"

I really would like to go to this! I am making this a matter of prayer, Because This is something i REALLY feel called to be and do!

Sunday, January 25, 2009

Darn Busy Weekend!

I SO wanted to blog this weekend! But, here it is 10:00pm on sunday night and did i get a chance? NOPE! my weekend flew by! :::::::::::WOOOSH::::::::::: * sigh* maybe tommorrow! I have got ALOT to say! But i Am WAY too Tired to get into it! Stay tuned!

Friday, January 16, 2009

My Goals for 2009, Vision mapping/ The Shack

I have Just started Going to a Group that meets at my Church. It is a Women's Group that Helps Women deal with Life Issues, so that they can Be free from those issues, Get out of Gods way, So he can develop them Into the Women He has Called them to BE! I have really Felt Led to Go to these meetings, and, I heard that they were doing the Study Boundaries, So i decided to give it a try!

My first time there was last Tuesday. Only I found out that they were not doing the study that night, Instead they are having a Guest Speaker that night. This Speaker was going to Speak on Journaling! I love it! this is something that i have started doing on my own! Now, i guess i don't do it in the conventional sense,but, Blogging IS still Journaling weather its in a Regular Journal, Or an electronic one. I really Felt like this is Definitely a Confirmation of the Direction i have been feeling that God wants me to go in! YAY!

I don't have ANY problem with people seeing this Journey of self discovery/ Spiritual Growth of mine that i will be Blogging about from time to time, I want to live a Life that is REAL and Authentic For God! I Am totally DONE putting on a Show/ Mask for People! Anyway, As the Speaker was talking, She seem to Hit on ALOT of the topics that i have been Dealing with On my own! I take that as confirmation that i am on the right track!:) She as she talked about Journaling and vision mapping, she asked each one of us what our strengths were. When she came to me, My mind went blank and all i could think of was the gift of encouragement. But, i was acting out of self conscious when i said that because unlike some of the other women there i actually KNOW my strengths! I really enjoyed listening to her and when she talked about vision mapping( which is actually a way of Putting your goals for that year on paper) I at first thought" I don't have a clue about what those are?" But, as i listened and thought about my strengths, I realized that there ARE things that Are goals i have in Mind for this year. This is what i have come Up with so far:

1. Dealing with/relating with my kids better, more effectively. You know, as i typed this, and i reflect on my Performance review@ work yesterday( another Blog post) I want ALL to Improve ALL of my interpersonal relationship skills, and Learn to relate with all people more effectively.

2.Growing With my Husband in our Marriage:( He's an AWESOME Godly man!)
A. Spiritually
C Financially

3.Continuing to Develop Myself into the Person God wants me to Be! there is a reason that i have had all this Growth and development and i really believe its for:

4. Refining and Developing my Ministry. God has Given me a Specific Purpose (Jeremiah 29:11!!) ( like he has everyone!) But, i have recently zeroed in and become aware of what God has called me to do! ITS awesome that I finally know! My Goal in this area is to move in the direction that i Feel called to, continue to be open to God's leading as this is taking shape:) I Don't want to do the leading in this, and become Locked in to MY idea of what it should be, but, i want to Let God direct it!

I just have finished reading The Shack WHOA! This is a POWERFUL Book! i am going to have to re-read it because its so Good! Now i know that this is a Work of fiction, and not a Theological textbook, but alot of the Ideas and things that are in this book made me go hmmmm.. I never thought of that, in that way before! I Totally Think that this Book in my Life at this time was a Divine appointment for me! If you want to See more, or find out more about this book! go to www.theshackbook.com There you can Find a WHOLE lot more about it and decide if this book is for you! I guarantee you wont be disappointed!

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

The Ultimate Gift

Last night I went to a Women's function at our Church that we have there Called Girlfriends Unlimited. They have groups that have games, a Chance to watch a movie together, Play games, do Crafts, Or discuss a Book that the Group has decided to discuss that you decide on the month before, you Read the Book and come the following month to discuss it. Well, i Picked the Movie, which is called Flicker Chicks! The movie we watched was called The Ultimate Gift. I love this movie from the first time i saw it! But, last night as i was watching it,I got more than i didn't the other times i watched it, and i really felt the need to Blog about it.

If you haven't seen this movie, it is about a Young man that Has always been a Trust Fund Baby, and has never had to work a day In his life. Well, The Grandfather Dies and the entire family, that is like him, Attends the funeral,One of Man sons, mentions, " I wonder who he Paid to get it to rain today?" which is pretty much the tone of the ENTIRE family. The day of reading of the will comes and the whole family is there.. waiting for what is OWED them. One by one they get what the Rich man left them, much to many of their dismay. They are told when they are told what their part of the Inheritance is, they have to leave. So, one by one they leave, and then the Grandson strolls in almost at the end of the reading of the will and his mother says, your late! for nothing!
The Grandson rolls his eyes and turns around to leave, and then the executor of the will says, Jason, you wont know for sure, if you don't stick around to find out! So he does, But its not what he's expecting! This Begins a Journey for Jason that his grand father tells him ( thru previously recorded clips) that he is leaving him a series of Gifts leading up to one "Ultimate Gift" if he messes up, and doesn't follow them and complete them exactly as he's set forth, that's it! hes done!and he gets nothing! Jason, reluctantly Begins this Journey, But along the way he learns ALOT who he is as a Person, that Totally challenges and Changes who he is. These Gifts are:

The Gift Of Work: Learning the Value of a Job well done and Doing things for the Right reasons." he who loves his work never labors"- The Ultimate Gift website

The Gift of Problems: ( excerpt taken from The Ultimate Gift Website)
In The Ultimate Gift, Red Stevens recalls, "One of the great errors in my life was sheltering many people from life’s problems. If we are not allowed to deal with small problems, we will be destroyed by slightly larger ones." We each have problems of all sizes in our lives, but it’s the spirit in which we greet them that truly determines their magnitude. Whoa! That's HUGE! As i read that, I realized that that has been one of MY failings as a Parent! But, in order for Us for our kids to Function on their own it is Necessary! THAT is HUGE for me.

The Gift of Friends : Jason learns In this Gift the Value of True friendship and and he learns that once he didn't have money( which his Grandfather arranged before his death for him to be cut off in this second Gift) He didn't have any friends, even his Girlfriend deserts him. He meets Emily and her mother who's Idea of friendship is Different. It is based on Not what the person can do for them, but, the relationship themselves, and they accept people based on who they are not what they can do for them.

The Gift of Giving:
(Excerpt taken from the Ultimate gift website) "Conventional wisdom would say that the less you give, the more you have. The converse is true. The more you give, the more you have. Abundance creates the ability to give; giving creates abundance. This principle is true in every area of your life." when Jason has to take the Money he has earned and find someone that needs it more, he learns that there is More to life than just focusing in himself and his needs.

The Gift of Gratitude: Its important for us to be A grateful people. to take the time to let the People that are close to us know how much we appreciate them on a regular basis.

The Gift of Family:( excerpt Taken from The Ultimate gift website)Families are like vitamins for the soul. They give us strength, they help us heal, and they build immunities against the outside forces that can hurt us. Today, as you enjoy your weekend, reflect on what your family means to you. Also think of the activities, experiences and values that help connect your family. I think that i will pursue getting my whole family to do a Study on this, I really feel that this is the Missing Piece that my Kids are lacking... Hopefully, them seeing these gifts( lessons) a Light bulb will come on in their Brains, like it is for me writing this blog.

The Gift of Laughter: ( excerpt taken from The Ultimate Gift Website)Happy people generally have a positive, joyful outlook on life. They tend to look for and think about the positive aspects of people, things, situations, and events. They can laugh at themselves and brush off little setbacks that others will brood over for days. Even in our saddest moments, laughter can be the best medicine to heal our heart and mend our minds. Start a healthy family habit that will help everyone develop a more positive outlook on life. Make the dinner hour, when you are all together, a time to share with each other the best part of your day. Take turns and really listen. This simple ritual expresses a lot about who we are and what makes us happy. Use the Joy Chart to stimulate some healthy competition. Anyone who can think of three or more good things that happened to them that day earns a happy face on the chart. Whoever has the most happy faces by their name wins the best prize of all: a life full of joy and all the good things that come to someone who looks for them!This is Another Huge thing that i Really WANT my family to start doing. We really need to become Intentionally positive people, Looking for the Good in Each other and Encouraging the Strengths, and forgive the weaknesses.

The Gift of Learning: Education is a lifelong Journey who's destination expands as you travel- The Ultimate Gift website.

The Gift of a Day: In this Lesson Jason learns that happiness in life isn't about getting things, but, its about what you give away to others. Realizing that life is Precious and it isn't about what you are given in life, but what you give, and do for others, Especially Love.

The Gift of Love: ( excerpt taken from The Ultimate Gift Website)
One of the most precious gifts you can give someone you love is your time, especially in today’s busy world. When was the last time you invited your spouse out to dinner or took your mother to lunch? Can you imagine how special it would be if you invited your daughter on a ‘date’ where you help teach her how a man should treat a lady? Or how about planning a fishing trip with your grandson - just the two of you? Couples need to make time for their relationship to keep their love alive and strong. And children crave the one-on-one time that makes them feel cherished. None of us, no matter what our age, ever outgrows the need to feel loved and appreciated.
This one is SO true and something we Try to do on a regular basis, both as a couple and as a family.

The Gift of a Dream: { excerpt taken from The Ultimate Gift website)
Dreams are an important part of who we are as individuals. The ability to dream and believe in a dream is the foundation for success in every aspect of life. People who accomplish great things all begin with a dream, while those who don’t chase their dream are often disappointed. When we allow the Gift of Dreams into our lives and summon the courage to follow our dreams, we begin to experience life at its fullest. The key to making dreams come true is making them real. This means putting your dreams down on paper, sharing them with others and actually planning the steps you can take to move closer to making your dreams come true. In the Movie Jason takes the Money he is given by his Grandfather and uses ALL of it to get a Bunch of his grandfathers associates to build a Place adjacent to the hospital for Parents Of terminally ill kids to live, work and take care of themselves and the rest of the family while their kids are being treated at the hospital.

The Gift of Money (Also the Gift of love): Because he gave ALL of the 100 million dollars that was first given to him, to one thing all at once . His grandfathers Executor/ friend tells him he how proud he is of him and the man hes become, and that he needs him to come by the office, he has something to share with him. Jason goes and he brings out one last video.Its his grandfather telling him how much he loves him and that if he's watching this video its because he's given the entire hundred million away to charity, and that he has completed ALL of the Gifts above and beyond whats been asked of him, and then he says How hes accomplished all that he's ever wished for him and now he knows that while his grandson is alive, his legacy will live on thru him. then executor opens a final box and reads from another codicil of his will that he has left Jason the Bulk of the estate estimated at a value of over 2 billion dollars.

Now to me, I don't consider the fact that he inherited the bulk of his grandfathers estate to be the Ultimate Gift. I consider that the lessons that he learned from those gifts, that gave him the Strength of Character that he had at the End of the movie, making him the Man he Became, THAT was the Ultimate Gift! And that is the Gift i wish to give my kids, and that is the Person i desire to be most!

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Kids and Other things that make you SCREAM!

What is it exactly, that makes kids( teens in my case)Tune you totally out and not hear you at all when you ask them to not do something( fidgeting, drumming on walls, counters, body parts, etc..) or to do something( chores, or any other simple task that they are asked to do). I mean, i ask really nicely the first time, then, when i am ignored, ( which is usually the case). I ask again, hopping to be heard! them usually bye the 20,000Th time! ( OK, i lied,its not that much!) but, bye the 3 or forth time, I get tired of being IGNORED and get really irritated and lose it! OH then they hear me and look at me like i have Grown 2 heads and have lost my mind! WHAT THE HECK??? what is it in them that chronologically does not hear me??? I don't get it! i know each of them understands the frustration of not being listened to, and having your wishes totally disregarded!! I don't understand how its any different for me!!! I really don't think i ask TOO awful Much of them... I really don't! I expect them to Clean up after themselves and to take turns doing the dishes. There are kids is ALOT WORSE situations! So why the Hassle???My 14 yr old dsd had been getting up and taking initiative and doing them on her own without having to be asked and i LOVED that! We even rewarded her because we thought 1. it would motivate the other kids to action, and 2. we knew she was doing it for the right reason. she hasn't volunteered to do any chores lately, now i understand that being the only one doing it on their own all the time gets old , but totally stopping to do stuff doesn't help her either. The other kids... not so much...My 11 yr old Dss HAS done it once in a while on his own.. while My Biological offspring.. 13and 16 yr old it takes an act of congress to get them to do them, the 13 yr old will do it sometimes when asked, but she doesn't ever complete the task! My 16 yr old fights tooth and nail and drags it out into a BIG HUGE deal! I really do love ALL of these Kids, and i want us to have fun, but BOY OH BOY.. do they frustrate me!!!

1.I have asked them to check in the laundry room once a day for their clothes, yet they sit down there for days on end!!
2.I ask them if they are going to do their own laundry( which is something else i just realized they are EXPECTED to do.oops!) i ask that they don't just leave it in the washer and expect the magic laundry fairy
( me!) to come Finnish it for them!
3. I ask them to Please not sit in the living room and have a loud conversation while someone( usually me, they don't dare it with their dad!) is trying to watch a show!

The list goes on and on.. and right now i am REALLY FRUSTRATED with all of them.. because they arn't doing anything i have asked and asked them NOT to do.!Or the things i have asked them to do, i have to remind and remind. They just don't seem to understand that once i am frustrated because i haven't been listened to for all of these various reasons, .. frustration BUILDS! Anyone has their breaking point and I just cant understand why they cant see that its because they DON'T listen to me! and then i have to deal with the Various Attitude that they throw MY way because I get angry!Now, don't get me wrong, these kids are ALL GREAT KIDS! even my 11yr dss, that STILL has a Problem with me being in authority over him, and cant seem to follow even the SMALLEST direction, and has many times done what he has wanted to do anyway, regardless of what i( or anyone else) says( but there are other influences coming into play in this case also! ) . I just hope this is something that is just a phase, however, i even despair of that because, i had a really nice conversation with my DSD by text last week.. and it really seemed like we connected, and she understood me, and i really felt we got somewhere! But now i feel like either she didn't remember it, or we didn't connect on the level i thought we did because now shes acting like it never happened, and were back to square one.
* SIGH* Well, I guess this Just Comes with the territory, but, I wish i could get a little understanding from the other side.. These Kids are NOT small Children, and they SHOULD understand, but, like my hubby Frequently tells me, Maybe i am expecting them to Be little adults. Who knows..

Thursday, January 8, 2009

God Reveals a little Bit more

My General Manager Handed me a Paper the Other day for me to fill out in order for her to give me my Evaluation for my Work performance. On that Paper it Listed It had 5 Strengths listed in numerical order.

1. Developing myself
2.Interacting with Children
3.Inspiring People to Take action
4.Being in the Middle of the action

We came to this Being my 5 Main strengths using cards that sort the things that you like most to do and narrowing them down to these 5 Strengths.

Directly below these Strengths was this Question: How am i currently Using these Strengths here at Chick-fil-a? Now i have REALLY Grown to HATE these kinds of questions, mainly because i couldn't for the life of me Figure out what to say or how to describe it. But since i have been treating my ADD its been SO much easier to Express myself on paper or verbally. So, after Getting a little Brain storming with my hubby i figured out what direction i wanted to take in answering these questions. this is what i put for each one.

Developing myself- I have been Using this Strength By Learning More about myself. Finding out what my weaknesses are and where my Strengths lie. Learning about Healthy Boundaries,and becoming aware of areas in my life where I don't have healthy boundaries and learning how to establish them.
Becoming more aware of My worth in God's Eyes and not basing my opinion of myself ( or whether I am doing a good job or a Bad Job based on the leaders emotions!) and Most of all learning to confront issues that I have with others without Dissolving into a puddle of tears because of Fear or Rejection!

Interacting with Children-Noticing that Kids are People( customers) Too! I am using this to assist kids on the front line, and, in the Dining room where they might be overlooked. Kids are Important as well, because their Parents are the Main customers, and if the Kids are Recognized as having value as a customer then the parents are that much more inclined to want to come back.

Inspiring People to Take action- By Learning the Qualities of a Person of Influence. By Being the Example for Other People to Follow all the Time no matter what other people are doing or are not doing. By Doing The things that No one Else will do. By Adding Value to my Team members and leaders.

Being in the Middle of the action- I am always looking for what I can do, if, for instance its slow and there isn't any customers to be helped, I can always find something that needs to be done. I Love to Pitch in and help where people need assistance. My Heart is to Serve that is my Main calling/ gifting / Talent.

Coaching- Helping New Team Members with learning how to do The Job, being there to support and encourage. I am learning to do this in a More Constructive way that encourages and Empowers the New team members. This is a Strength that thru Self discovery, I am realizing that I am not as Strong at this one than the other ones. Maybe a better explanation of it is I misunderstood what this Looked like and that is changing as I Grow Personally and spiritually.. Encouraging is also one of my areas of Gifting so I know that is still a strength. There is Another question after that asks:

"How can i Use these Talents in the next six months?
I answered each of them individually like this:
Developing myself: Continuing to Grow in the areas I have and finding new areas in which to grow. Having my Priorities In the Correct order. Pursuing a Correct Work/ Life Balance that allows me to Give My family my Best and Chick-Fil-A my best , in a way that Ultimately Glorifies and Honors God. Being the Person that thinks( problem solves) for themselves and Helps the Leadership by Not being the Person that they Dont have to Supervise constantly. My overall Goal is to Become the Person of Influence that God has called me to be.
Interacting with Children: making Sure Kids are valued as customers just like the adults. Improving my focus on that.

Inspiring others to take Action: Developing and becoming the Person of Influence that God has Called me to Be, that Encourages and Equips my coworkers / family to be their Best. Focusing on Team building rather than Self Accomplishment.

Coaching: Continuing to learn about Building up new workers and Encouraging Good ( second mile effort) and also encouraging those struggling in that. To help leadership foster a Positive Motivating environment that brings out the best in others. Being a person of Influence!

As I wrote this I realized that This is something that applies to EVERY area of my life! With my family, with the Ministries i am Involved with at Church, and at work. It made me realize that this is WHO i want to be ALL the time! A Person of Influence! The Person who's life Ultimatly Glorifies God. Because, that, My friends is the Bottom line.

Sunday, January 4, 2009

Getting Life Back to normal

As i sit wondering what i should Blog about today, I am reflecting back on this Holiday Season! What a Busy Time! I am really Glad Things are getting back to normal and Back to our routine. I took my Son Back home yesterday:( I am Still really Tired from that and Staying up yesterday to watch the Colts Play( grrrr!). Now i can Focus on Moving forward with What i Feel that God Calling me Towards, My purpose, so to speak. I still Don't feel that its totally Taken Shape yet, But i do at least Know In which direction to move, Which i think is a Good thing, considering I didnt even know weeks ago. I was Moving in a total other direction and was getting frustrated because it wasn't working! (DUH!) no wonder! Anyway, I really think that God gives us a little Bit of it, a direction, and then sees what we do with it , or where we go with it and directs us from there. I am Really Excited to see what all unfolds for Me and my Family and my Church family! This is an Exciting time!