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This is My Blog. The Content Of this Blog Changes, and WILL Change. It is about Everything that is Important to me! So, I hope you enjoy this brief glimpse in to my Brain!

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Monday, December 28, 2009

New Year's Resolutions, and Other things I dont Necessarlly Like to Do....

Hi There! Remember Me?? Yeah.... The Woman who hasn't Updated her Blog in....... oh..... I don't know..... 6 Mos??smilies

I DO have various and sundry reasons why i haven't updated. Including and not limited to being Extremely busy... the holidays.... the Dog ate my blog.... wait... scratch that last one.sign smileys

But, Seriously folks, There is one thing I really, and i mean REALLY don't like to do.

and that is Make New Years Resolutions!

You know like..... Im going to Lose weight this year.....

Im gonna Eat Healthier......fighting smileys

Im gonna Stop Smoking( something i do NOT do BTW.. its just an example!)

Im gonna work out more....rolleye smileys smilies

Stuff like that. I have found that whenever i have done this in the Past... I have, like alot of People im Sure, Done really well with it at first. Then as the months go by... it happends Less and less......

Until its .... I made that as a resolution?? .. or I cant believe i didnt stick to ANOTHER resolution!!!!

So, one day i resolved to not make New Years Resolutions anymore because that way i wouldnt have feel like a failure anymore Because i couldnt keep them, and it was wroking really well for me!

But, I have Decided something else....

I am gonna Break my No Resolutions Rule this year.

I am going to Resolve to do my Best to try and Post to this blog at least once a month, if not once a week.....
Because I truely do like doing it, and its a Great outlet!

So, there ya go!

Im so glad to be back!! so many times i would get a good idea for a Blog Post, and then get distracted by something else or busy somewhere else....

Im going do my Best to Stay on track and not do that anymore.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Servolution Top 10: A Lesson From Ben and Jerrys (Servolution Group Blogging Project)

A Lesson from Ben and Jerry’s

This is an Amazing Book! I think that it’s SO cool how the Things that are the Heart of God are Being Placed in Believers ALL OVER the Country! For Several Months now I have felt a Tug in my Spirit That I had yet to Experience Everything that God Has called me to be. Up until now I have served in my Church’s Children’s Ministry, and have served in my Church’s Choir. Worship for me, was and Still is my way of really Connecting with God, and I had always Felt Called to Music Ministry. My Kids Loved the Children’s ministry at my Church, so, I volunteered in the Classes, and found that I really enjoyed that also, and I had started to build relationships with The Children’s Pastor and Her Assistant. They turned out to be People that really have been a constant, Positive Force in my Life Both as a Single Mom and as a Married Mom. As time has Gone By and Things have changed, I had begun to wonder if that was all there was. Then, I had been getting this Unction that God was going to be taking me in a new direction.

I prayed for Direction and Guidance since this was a Totally Unknown thing to me, all I knew was that Every time I saw People Helping the Hurting, it Struck SUCH a HUGE chord Deep within me. I always know that something is a “God” thing (something that God really wants to get across to me) when I see it confirmed in Several Places, My Pastor Preaches on it, I see it on a Show I am watching, or listening to a Podcast of one of my Favorite Teachers of the Word, My Husband talks to me about it out of the Blue Etc… Serving Others, People in Need Especially I feel is one of those things.

Now, I am not a Person that is really Spooky about my Beliefs, Meaning I don’t think that God Speaks to me in an Audible voice.
I think that if he did it would scare the Daylights out of me!! (it’s not that I don’t think he can, just that There is SO MANY OTHER ways for Him to Speak to us, that there isn’t really any need!) One Day, I felt that The Holy Spirit Speak to me that My Purpose Was to be a Servant to All. That was it! Just that!

My first thought was ok… So, what does that mean? As I contemplated this, God Made Sure that I had PLENTY of Ideas and a Clearer understanding of what he Meant, This Book was one of those Things that confirmed what my Actual Purpose was meant to be. As I was reading this Chapter and Preparing for this Blog Post, I felt that God gave me this Verse:

John 21:16-17 (New Living Translation)
16 Jesus repeated the question: “Simon son of John, do you love me?” “Yes, Lord,” Peter said, “you know I love you.” “Then take care of my sheep,” Jesus said. 17 A third time he asked him, “Simon son of John, do you love me?” Peter was hurt that Jesus asked the question a third time. He said, “Lord, you know everything. You know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Then feed my sheep.

When we serve others by meeting their needs when they are in a time of need, we are feeding God’s Sheep and that to me is Very Cool!


1. This is Our Mandate.
In the Book Dino Rizzo talks about his Church, Healing Place Church, Their Vision for their Church is to be a “Healing Place for a Hurting World” He States that if they are going to Say it then they need to deliver it. That if you are a “follower of Christ that your Mandate is to “love one another” and that reaching out to the World and Being Jesus’ hands and feet, Is how to deliver it, my Home Church’s Name Like Healing Place Church, Is Called Lifebridge. Life Bridge’s Vision Is Connecting to God, Each Other, and the World Thru Christ. Like Healing Place Church, Lifebridge is a Place that Anyone of Any Background, Denomination, and Walk Of Life can come in and Feel Loved and Welcomed and Cross a Bridge into Life in Christ.

2. We are not looking for a badge
This to me is the Ultimate Worship to God! It’s not something we can Claim ownership of Otherwise it’s for the Wrong Reason, and God isn’t glorified; only self is.

3. There are no Excuses
In the Book Servolution Dino Rizzo talks about the many excuses People have used to avoid getting involved, Such as: “The Problem is Too Big” and “we’ll never be able to make a Difference” or “we don’t have anything to offer” He Says they are just copouts, and I Agree with him! If everyone took this Mindset then nothing would ever happen. The point isn’t what you CANT do, but, what you CAN do, and EVERYONE has Gifts and Talents and can do SOMETHING! I like the way he puts that in the Book.

“It is true that we cannot do everything. But, we absolutely cannot let that thought keep us from doing what we can. All of us have Gifts and talents to offer and all of us are able to do something to meet the needs of the hurting around us if we are willing to let God use us!”

4. Give with No Strings attached
About a year to two years My Pastor Started a Campaign in our Church Specifically Called No String attached! Seriously! He encouraged us to Do Random acts of Kindness for Strangers, for example, Paying for someone’s Meal in the Drive thru, Or like In the Book Dino Paid for The Service members Coffee anonymously. He gave us all Cards for the Cashier ( or Whoever)to give to the Person Being Blessed that Said No Strings attached on one side and it had a little map on the other side and Below the Map it said Lifebridge.cc That was it, nothing else. The Point is that Is made so Well in the book is that We Never want People to Feel Like that they owe us something in return, If they do, then We haven’t Done our Job, to Be Like Jesus. Jesus went around Giving and Healing Without any thought of what he was going to get in Return.

5. Be Ridiculously Generous!
In the Book, Dino Rizzo Talks about Being as Ridiculously Generous as God was with Us, when he Sent His Son to Die For Our Sins, Instead of Getting what we Deserved! I can’t truthfully say that I have been Ridiculously Generous in my Past Dealings But; this is something I want to Strive for.

6. Do Justice Intentionally
I think what they Meant Was To get out there and Intentionally Minister to the Homeless, the forgotten, and the broken, to Love them like God does, and To Leave the Changing of them to Him.

7. To Help People Be Overcomers.
In The Book Servolution it States “We Want to Help People Prosper in their Souls-to move beyond a culture of blaming the World, having a Victim mentality, and being addicted to handouts. We want to see them replace all of that with the Abundant Life Jesus gives.”

8. Increase Your Capacity
What I got from this Point was to Always Be challenging yourself to Step out of your Comfort Zone and to do something that you feel is WAY above your head. This Blog Post for me is one of those things! I just Started Blogging Last December, So, to be Participating in this Blogging Project for me is a Real Step out of the Boat for me!

9. Build the Local Church
This, to me, means something a little Different, than Dino Rizzo stated it. To me, it Means to Come Along side other Churches and to Link Arms with them, and work in Unity for the Body of Christ in our City to Share with the World Our Hope in Christ. That to me is Building the Local church, not making things out to be about one particular Church Body. Because we(the Body of Christ) are the Church, The Building is Just a tool.-(Pastor Bill Campbell, Lifebridge Church)

10. Remember the Poor
This to me is not just the Poor Financially, but, the Poor in Spirit, as well, The Broken people that No one wants to be bothered with, Loving the Unlovely, I have heard it called Before, I want to Pursue a Heart That Breaks at the Things that Break Gods Heart.

Get the book: Servolution: Starting a Church Revolution Through Serving

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

The Love Dare Day 4: Love is Thoughtful

Love Is Thoughtful.

Love Thinks about Being Thoughtful...

When Couples First Start Out, it is all they can do to do things that are thoughtful for Each other.
But, As Time Goes by, Life gets in the way..( Kids, Bills,Other Life Pressures) and Alot of the time, those that were so, in love Before,Get comfortable with the other Person and Start to take the Relationship for Granted.

Marriage Adds another Person to the Picture of your Life and If your thinking doesnt Include the Other Person You can Find yourself Missing Opportunitys to Show Love, and the Other Person will See this as Being Thoughtless and Self Centered.

Men and Women Think and Comunicate Differently. Men tend to Say exactly what they Mean and Communicate Directly. Where on the other hand Women tend to think and Speak Between the Lines, Kinda Hinting around at things. If A couple Doesnt understand this about the other, it can Lead to Lots of Fallout in the Marraige and endless Disagreements.

He thinks shes Playing Mind Games, and Gets Frustrated with this perception, wondering Why cant She Just say what she wants and Quit trying to expect Him to read Her Mind. She Wonders why He's Being So Inconsiderate, and Just wants him to put the Pieces together and "get it".

Most of the time this Ends in Frustration and "Shooting First and Asking questions later" and an argument, When this can be resolved by understanding and Not giving in to Speaking harshly.
A husband should take the time to " read between the Lines" of what his Wife is saying, and wives need to State Exactly what it is they want, and not say one thing when they mean another.

Love Requires Thoughtfulness on Both Sides of the Relationship for it to Thrive.

If both Sides Understands this and Works to Meet in the Middle Putting Each other First,The Relationship is all the Better for it. Next Time I will strive to Spend a few minutes to think of how best to Understand and demonstrate Love to my Husband.

A Great Marraige Comes From Taking the Time To Show Thoughtfulness.

Servolution: the group blogging project

I Am So EXCITED to Let you all Know That Yours Truly Is going to Be a Part of this Group Blogging Project!! ( Yes, i am Still going to Continue the Love Dare) But, I really Felt Like this was Something I should do. Its TOTALLY out of my Comfort Zone!!

For the First time EVER Since i have Been Blogging, One of my Posts Will be On Another Blog. So, Please Pray That God is Glorified By what i Blog.*whew* I can Feel myself Being Stretched Already!!!

( and Yes, I am going to Post it on here as well...) But, you Can Click on the Link
(The book) to go to the Site That the Project is Being Hosted at! I encourage you to Do so... This Guys Blog ROCKS!

Saturday, June 6, 2009

Day 3 Love is not Selfish

OK, This is Something Everyone of us have Dealt with either now or in the past, Being Selfish.

Being Selfish is the Opposite of Love because Love does not Seek to Put itself First, but Love Puts its Needs After the Object of their Affection. We ALL at one Point are Guilty of the Self-seeking behavior of Selfishness. It is Something we Tolerate in ourselves but Cant STAND in others.

When the Husband in a marriage Puts his Wants and Needs Above that of His Wife's.. That is a Sign of Selfishness, When a Wife Constantly Complains about the things She does meeting the Needs of her Husband, That's Selfishness (Ouch! that one is a little too close to home for me!)

True Love Seeks out to meet the Needs of the Other Person in their marriage. You come to a Place where your either meeting the Needs of your Spouse out of love for yourself( what can be done for you) Or out of Love for Others( doing it Because you know that it will meet their Needs and make them Happy.)

This Leads to having Much more fulfillment in your Marriage, and any other relationship for that matter. The Questions we Need to Ask ourselves( Meaning me! and anyone else!) when we are trying to See for ourselves weather our Motives are Selfish- or Out of Love are:

1.Do i Truly want wants Best for my Spouse?
2.Do i want them to Feel Loved by me?
3.Do they feel i have their Best interests in mind?
4 Or Do they See me as looking out for Number one First?

weather we want to admit it or not, we Do have a Reputation with our Spouses, its Up to Us weather or not is a Good one or a negative one.

I have Done this and when i have Put my Husbands Needs over my own, He feels Much more loved and Respected.

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Sunday, May 24, 2009

The Love Dare Day 2

Ok! I am Moving on to Day 2! YAY! Its Been a Little bit, But, I am Not on anyone's Time Schedule But, God's, So its all good!

Day 2 is Love is Kind.

In the Book they Break Down Kindness in to 4 Basic Core Ingredients:

1.Gentleness: Gentleness is Kindness when your Careful about How you Treat your Spouse or kids in how you Speak to them, not being too Harsh or critical, Gentleness Wants to Be Kind in Addressing them. Even when there is something that Needs to be Addressed Gentleness Bends over Backwards to Make the Issue as Easy to be heard as Possible.

2. Helpfulness: Helpfulness is Kind when you Meet the Needs of the Moment. Doing things that need to be done, because they need to be done, Not for any reward that you may receive, even to the Point of Putting off your own needs for the Moment if you have to.

3.Willingness: Willingness is kind when you are agreeable, when you look for ways to Compromise and Accommodate someone Else's Needs, Instead of Demanding your own way.

4.Initiative: This is Kindness when you are Proactive about Someone else's happiness By looking for Ways to be Kind in advance, and then taking the Steps to make that happen, you dont wait til that person Deserves it,you Do it now:)

Its really hard to Do these things when you Feel your Spouse Doesnt Deserve it, But, Love is a Choice, Not a Feeling and Marriaige is Daily Choices of How you want your Marraige to be, and Love is Showing Kindness when their doesnt Seem to Be anything You get from it.

My Day 2 dare:

This day You are suppose to Keep doing the Day 1 Dare Plus, doing at least one Unexpected Kind act for your Spouse

I am Happy to Report that this is Something that Works Very well:)

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

The Love Dare Day 1

OK! WOW! This Love Dare is Some Seriously DEEP,DEEP! Stuff...Because of that I will be taking my Time on this Study! WHOA! Talk about Diging down WAY Deep into your Soul and Digging out the Bad! WOW! I read day one over to my Husband... and i felt like i was being Sucker-punched, Because EVERYTHING i was reading, was the Heart of Issues, that we have have being circling around between him and i for the last almost 5 yrs, and it made me REALIZE what he has been trying to say!! Not to say that HE doesnt have his own issues, He does, and he stated that, but, WHOA the further i read that... the more i REALIZED that he has told me this, time aftertime, after time! I have also stated that this Blog and Study isnt about whats wrong with him, and what i can make him change, or Pester him to death about, This is ALL about me!!! and realizing what I need to Change! This is some SERIOUS Heart Surgery Of the GOD kind!

Monday, May 4, 2009

The Love Dare Day 1

Ok, I am Starting this off with a Disclaimer. I will NOT be Blogging Personal Intimate Details of my Marriage during this Series. My Goal of taking this is Learning to Love my Husband Better, ( and to deal with ALL of my relationships in a better way) and not doing things that Bring dishonor to him, by, Sharing Stuff that shouldn't on here. What i WILL be Blogging about is the Chapter i am on and how its affecting me and how I relate to it:)

Ok? 'Nuff said!
MySpace Christian Quotes Graphics

Chapter 1

Love Is Patient

WOW! Chapter 1 Would Be the One thing i have always Struggled with the Most.
I Can Be a Very Impatient Person! My Husband Calls me " Patience" Because i can be SO Impatient! I am One that Will quickly Retaliate when my Husband offends me More often than i really would like to admit! This is something i want to Change! This is Probably the MAIN reason for me to take this LOVE Dare, Because i have Seen this Lack of patience wreck Havoc in More than Just my Marriage.
I believe that this One thing Is the Key to a Whole Slew of Issues! Wow, No wonder they have this First! I am really Looking forward to seeing the Tone it Sets in my Household.
MySpace Christian Quotes Graphics

Sunday, May 3, 2009

The Love Dare

This Is a Challange I am Doing At a Christian Womens Blogger Site that i am a Member of
Its a 40 Day Challenge that I think will Be Life Changing! I am Looking forward To it, But I am Kinda Leery Because I am Thinking of Doing with With an Accountablity Partner, Which is a little Scary to me. I dont know why Because Transparency is what i WANT!! Anyway! I will be Blogging my Journey on here! Join ME if you like at :

The Love Dare - Christian Women Take Root!

Purpose and Our Choices


God has a Specific Purpose and Plan For our Lives, and i Believe That with All My Heart!

But, Sometimes I really Think that the Choices we Make, and the Actions Choose, and Reactions we Give Delay, or totally Distract us From the Purpose that God has for our Lives. We have a BIG enemy That DOESN'T want to see Us Succeed! an Enemy that Enemy will Use Everything in its Power to see that we don't, and ya know what?

I think that Sometimes we Make it EASY for The Enemy, Because he just uses our own Faults and weaknesses Against us, so that he Doesn't have to do ANYTHING, but sit back and watch Us Fail. He uses our Prideful-ness, our Lack of self- control in our Speech, and Behavior To Derail Us from what God is Calling Us to be. But We, the Other hand, DO have the Choice to come to a Realization that we have the Power to Change that!

God Wants us to Be The Mature Person that He Calls us to be,Just Like any Parent. So, Today, I Am Choosing that! I Have Come to a Place in my Life, in My Walk With God that Doesn't Want the Drama and immaturity That Comes From Being a Baby Christian that Wants to Live In my Old Ways and Old Self. I am SO ready To Step IN to ALL God Has for me!! I have been Getting glimpses of it here and There and I don't have a total Idea of all it is yet, But, I DO know It is MUCH Better than anything I have now or have had in the Past.

This Has come about because of a Situation With a Person that i Thought i knew and i Thought was my Friend. But, Their actions have Given me a Glimpse into a Person I Never knew they were. I think it has always been there, I Just never saw it or choose not to see it, or i wasn't at a Place in my Personal and Spiritual growth, that i would realize it.

I Am not saying Anything Negative about this Person other than the fact that i have Just realized that they are not the Person I thought they were, and that Is my Misconception. They are Still God's Child, God Still Loves them just as much as me or anyone else, and Its Not My Place to Judge their Actions. But, It has Made me Think about My actions and Choices. Ihave the Choice to Choose to Be the Person that God Calls me to be,or Not.

I Don't want My Actions or Emotions to Be a detraction From Gods Glory Being Shown thru me. I Now, More than Ever Am DONE with The Drama of Things that Don't matter in the Light of Eternity.

I am CHOOSING to NOT react, to NOT be Drawn into things that Don't Glorify God. I Just Dont have time For it! I am Not saying that this is Going to Be the Way i am from now on, I am going to have Days that I still struggle with it, Just like anyone else. But I am Choosing to Move Forward and Continue to Step From the Pit Of my Old Behavior, to the Palace that God has Prepared for me.

I realized that Today More than Ever!

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Yeah! So I know its Been a While Since i have Posted ON this Blog.....


So, I know its been a LONNNGGG Time Since i have Posted On my Blog....

But, You have to Understand that i have Been held Captive By The Lollypop Guild When they Found out that I let my Membership lapse......


Ok, Hows this? I Lost my Way to the This Blog in the Blogosphere... Made a Wrong turn at a Certain Blog and WOW! I have Spent All this time Trying to Find my Way back!

Hmm, that doesnt Work Either?

Ok, So Seriously, I have Gotten Carried away In the business Of life and Just havent taken the Time to Blog. So, My Applogies!!! I Actually Didnt think that there Was many People That Actually Read my Blog, Until I had a Twitter Friend Ask me why i havent Updated My Blog in a while, that and that Little Voice in the back of my Head that has been saying.. " you know, you havent Updated your Blog in a while..."

So! Here is the Promissed Pictures.. a few of them... WinterJam Was as Wonderful as I was Expecting!

There IS MUCH more, But this Post would be FOREVER LONG if I Posted them all! So, There ya go! I Promise to Try Not to have so Much time In Between My Posts From now on...

Friday, March 13, 2009

WinterJam With 4 Teens

I Am SOOO Excited! I am Taking my Kids to Winterjam Today! I am A HUGE Fan of Toby Mac, So,I dont know Who's More Excited, Me or Them! I will Be taking Pictures and Some Videos( i dont know if i will post those or not) and Give you the the Lowdown on how it was! I am Expecting an AWESOME time, Especially since We are Going Early to get good Seats!

Thursday, March 12, 2009

My American Idol!!!

My American Idol! My Daughter Had a Talent Show Last Tuesday. This is Her Performance! I Thought It was Sung In a Key that was too High in the chorus at First, But, Actually She Did real well!! I Am Proud Of Her!

Monday, March 2, 2009

Listen Up Little Button Pushers!!

Listen UP Little Button Pushers!!

Yeah! You Know who you Are!

I am DONE! Letting you Push My BUTTONS! So, From Now on, I will ask for things to be Done,and I will Ignore the Subsequent Grumbling, Complaining, and General Nasty Comments That you Fling my Way( that you Prize as "voicing your Opinion") when you are Asked to do things that You think You shouldn't have to do.

I have More things that i have to focus on,other than Your Attempts at Helping the Enemy Undermine My Personal and Spiritual Growth. I have given you that Power by Falling into Your little Trap, that you Set Up for me with my Emotions, time and time again, So now i am NOT gonna Bite , and i am Going to Move on With what God Wants me to do.

I will Give you what you Want, and Let you Do things your way, and then,when You Reap the Benefits of the Freedom you have been given, and don't have any friends...( some of you are there already! BTW) Or Get Fired from Job after Job Because you Cant keep Your Mouth Shut...

I Don't want to Hear it!

It will be YOUR Problem Because I'm DONE! Done Trying to Explain myself on Why i do things.., Done Trying to Reason With you, To get you to understand the Difference Between Being Able to have an opinion with people in Authority and expressing it, and Being Argumentative,Rude, and Disrespectful. I am Taking Back the Authority I have Negated By Bringing myself Down to your Level.

So, Enjoy! I hope that works out for you later in life!

Sunday, March 1, 2009


This Morning's Church Service was REALLY amazing! We had Some Missionary's From our Denomination Come today and Speak. They were talking about Stuff the Do and their Ministry, and Stuff they Felt God was Speaking to us ( The Church). But these Missionaries Were People that We have Known and have been associated with our church for Many Years, So, they were More like Very old Dear Friends that have Come Back to Visit and Chat. I started to Feel a Tugging on my Heart, Or a Tapping on my Shoulder, of the Spirit of God saying "Psst, are you Paying attention this?" that Maybe this Call that God has on my Life was Sort of Related to Doing things on the Mission Field somehow. Well,Our Pastor Gave an Invitation that if this Spoke to you and you Feel a Unction(LOL if you read this Stacy Or Jody!)and this Message Has REALLY Spoke to you to Come Forward So, that they can Pray Over you and They can Launch you off in To what God Has called you To do. This REALLY Spoke to me and I went Forward. I felt God's Presence SO STRONG! So Much SO, that i was waiting in line while they came to us, one of my friends were talking to me and I had a Hard time Focusing on What She was talking about. I was In a zone, and didn't want to Be Distracted From what Was going to Be imparted to me! When She Finally Got To me, She Just Prayed as She Felt Led and WOW!! IT WAS TOTALLY spot ON! She Said that she Felt like i was Going in million Different Directions at once! and that She Prayed that God would Help slow me Down and ,focus on Just what he was calling on me to do! What she Prayed was Right on, Right Down to The Minutest Detail of a Decision I Made this week!!!!! I don't Know this Lady Very well Personally, and I have JUST Recently Introduced myself to her,So,There is NO OTHER way she could have known about these things Other than God Speaking thru her.

How Encouraging is THAT??? The God of the Universe Picking a Way To say Hey! Your Important to me! I care About you SO much that i am Going to Use this Person to show you How much I love you! How He knows the Things That you go thru In your life and they are important to Him!

This Song Randomly Spoke to me out of the Blue today! This is What was Confirmed to me in a HUGE way today!

YAY! I am TOTALLY Psyched!

But, Of course that the Enemy Doesn't want ANY of this Stuff for us! HE's a Sneaky Little TOAD that Will Try to STEAL, KILL, And Destroy! WELL, Sorry Mr TOAD! IT AINT HAPPENING!! I Will NOT allow you to STEAL FROM ME ANYMORE! This is MY Destiny! and you CANT have it! SO Long! ADIOS! You Dont have ANY control or authority in my life, because you are UNDER my FEET! Where you WILL remain! HA!

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Pepcon Disaster- May 4th 1988

I was watching Destroyed in Seconds on Discovery, and they had a Propane Plant catch Fire and Explode! Made me Think of A Similar Explosion that i Experienced In May of 1988. Since every other Disaster has a " Where were you When" Facebook Group I set out to Find a " Where were you when the Pepcon Plant Exploded on May 4,th 1988" Group on Facebook, only to find out that their doesnt seem to be One! That was One of the Terrifying Things that i have ever Been Directly Affected by. The September 11 attacks Were A Horrible thing for our Nation and Many more Lives were lost, but,this is as Close as i have ever Come to Knowing what it was like being in New york on that day.. and it wasnt even Close to being as Bad. I know that there are others that were affected by that day also... Then 9/11 happened and THAT disaster Was forgotten in light of this MUCH GREATER tragedy. Just Something i Remembered Because of Something i watched today, Intresting how Some things affect us that way? I havent thought about that for YEARS until i watched that show tonight.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

A New Way to Look at Things

I Just Saw this Video Recently, and I have to tell you I really Like these!

This is a Description of This Video. from the Nooma Website :

008 Dust:
Believing in God is important, but what about God believing in us? Believing that we can actually be the kind of people we were meant to be. People of love, compassion, peace, forgiveness, and hope. People who try to do the right thing all of the time. Who act on the endless opportunities around us every day for good, beauty, and truth. It’s easy for us to sometimes get down on ourselves. To feel “not good enough” or feel like we don’t have what it takes. But maybe if we had more insight into the culture that Jesus grew up in and some of the radical things he did, we’d understand the faith that God has in all of us.

WOW! God Believing in US? Is that as Life changing for you as it is for me? I mean WOWWOW! How Many more things Could we Accomplish if we See ourselves the way GOD sees us? This is SO Crucial to me right now, As I am on a Journey to Learn to see myself the way GOD and GOD alone sees me, and to get my Identity From that, and not what the World has tried to Define me.. NO the way i have BELIEVED the Worlds LIES About who they say i am!

God Believes in me!

How Dare I NOT believe in myself ANYMORE!

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

The Shack and God's Love For us

WOW! I love This Book! I went to my Girlfriends Unlimited Meeting and We discussed This Book.. its SUCH a deep Book.. its hard to cover Everything In 2 hrs.. On my Drive home The first Song that came on.. was This Song By Tenth Avenue North.. Its called BY Your Side... and the Lyrics Go like this..

Think God is Trying to tell us something here??? Or rather me? I know it is for All of us.. But, right at that point i Feel like it was Just Confirming what we just discussed, it was a very Personal Message to me!

Sunday, February 8, 2009

Loving Correction

Reciently I made a Comment to one of the Blogs i like to Read... The Question was What Song needs a Break.. And Someone made the Comment that they Thought that " Mighty to Save/ From the Inside Out" was ones THEY thought was a song that needed a Break... To Which i commented:

"Yeah, I would agree with From the Inside Out. We were doing that some Pretty Heavily for a while. Good song... But, It gets old..."

So, Have a Confession to Make! God made me Eat my Words in our Worship Service Today! Which is Why i am Learning to NOT say stuff like songs i think are tired and need a rest..( not that I think that is wrong or anything for anyone else make these Comments, ) But, Because I right away I felt like i was Limiting God , and as SOON as i say something like.. I dont ever want to have to do...This Thing.. Or Go that Place.. Is the Time Always( well, Most of the time) God manages to Put me in a Place of having to DO that which i said i never wanted to do,Or In MY case today.. I commented Recently On how i Felt that the Song " From the Inside Out" was one that needed a Rest... That was until today when our Worship Team Played that particular Song Today and The Spirit REALLY Moved on my Heart and Ministered to me and my Husband in a real Personal way today. So, I am here to Confess That I was convicted about doing that, with that particular song..This Is on One of the Blogs I have Just reciently Started reading pretty Regularly and I really LIKE! heres the Link In case you want to check it out for yourself( if you dont allready that is)its Ragamuffinsoul.com... I Knew the Minute they started Playing it.. I felt a Check in my Spirit..It was in a Loving way though:) No Condemnation at all! :) Just wanted to share!

Who Says God Doesn't have a Sense Of Humor! I love that About Him!

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Kids... *sigh*

This is a Follow up to My last Blog post! One step Forward, 10 Back. I Posted this to my Adhd Group on Monday.

My Husbands Step-son (who he's raised from an Infant, but isnt really biologically his) is going down an a Really bad road. He lives with his Mom. She Runs a VERY permissive household, she has only one rule... There ARE NONE! * sigh*. anyway, he had to move in with her because of some choices he mad when he lived here, that made it Necessary for him to move in with his mom.

Since then, its been totally down hill for him. He has gotten into Running with a Bad crowd, doing drugs,Having Indiscriminate Sex, He Is in the System( has a Police Record) for Vandalizing Property, and most recently been arrested for Shoplifting. He knows what hes doing is wrong. His excuse is "yeah, i know, but so and so made me do it". Or "They were the ones doing it! Im just an innocent bystander" Its NEVER him in anything.. So i have a ladies Small group that i Go to on the Second and fourth tuesdays, and since he has pretty Much distanced himself from us, ( he will go to his Friends house that he gets into trouble with, because his mom lets him, because she wants him out of her face, than to come over here) He went to this friends house over christmas( yes, his mom let him! she is all about herself) than to come with us and spend Christmas with us and go to his Grandparents.

Anyway,I digress! I had my ladies group pray and the leader said " wow, sounds like you have a Prodigal son on your hands", and that indicates a deeper heart issue" I told her i agreed, and we all Prayed for him. Yesterday, we had a Guest@ our church, that goes around and ministers to teens, especially teens in trouble heres the Link! Teen Rock Anyway, this Group came to our Church yesterday, and Ministered. And it seemed Like maybe He had a Breakthrough, and was touched by this Guys message and Ministry, and Didn't want to go down that road. Came up front the Guy Prayed with him and for him for quite a while!. To me it seemed like an Answer to Prayer.

On the way home he was talking about it, how he was going to shape his act up, and turn himself around. My husband said " Yeah, I'll believe it when i see it" as did his sister. I stuck up for him and said, " now, come on! Lets not be negative here" I encouraged him to not listen to the naysayers, and that i was really happy that he was reached and decided to turn his life around. I told him that i know i don't always show it, but that i really did love him and was really happy about this turn of events. He gave me a hug and told me how much he appreciated my encouragement, that it meant a lot to him. My husband took them to church( for youth groups Superbowl party)

I enjoyed the Game and went to pick them up. when i got there, they were dragging their feet, a few minutes later, This Friend of his and Brandon told His Mom A Bunch of Lies about Things i supposedly did and said, and said that they Both told her that i am constantly harassing him and Brandon, and that i talk bad behind their backs and make fun of his friend( this is Something my HUSBAND does, and he freely will admit that he does it, Because, the kid is a BAD INFLUENCE)

Anyway, I told her i didn't Know what she was talking about because I don't do those things! That is Just not in my Nature to do! ( and she would have only come to the knowledge of that threw Brandon)All of this In front of the Youth Pastor/ worship leader. I dont know what he heard or didn't because he was a little bit away from where we were standing). I confronted him( Brandon) about it after she left ( i was too stunned to do otherwise) and He got his cocky attitude back and asked him why in the world would she be coming to me asking me those things? He said, without looking me in the eye" because you and DAD do it all the time. I said, Brandon, that's a LIE you KNOW i don't do that. I told him how Disappointed i was in his Choice to betray my Trust. I told him that He stabbed me in the back, and i have Been Praying for him and Encouraging him, and i Stuck up for him to his dad he was being Negative. i said, WOW, i have stuck up for you and encouraged you and Prayed for you, and THIS is how you pay me back! I said I guess your dad was right. I guess you haven't changed, Your actions just showed me that.

I feel SO betrayed! I have Tried to Love him despite things he has done to me, and hes done to my kids. I have Been there for him( even though i HAVE gotten frustrated with his behavior ALOT!) His DAD has given him SO MUCH he has NEVER been obligated to do! and allways included him in the family( even during the Times I didn't want him around because of his behavior, Nasty attitude, Etc) and He Goes and throws our Family and our family's Name under the Bus! all in the name of his Friend that is SUCH a horrible influence that he would rather sacrifice US than someone hes only known 3 yrs. I am SO sad for Being Betrayed like that, like we are nothing more than a source for him to use when his mom gets on his nerves, or when he wants something from my Husband. We are at the Point of letting the prodigal go... Its hard, its a Situation that HE has Brought us to. thanks For reading if you made it this far. :)I know this has been long, but this situation is heavy on my Heart today.( Monday)

And a Friend of Mine(That i LOVE Dearly!Btw) Said to Encourage me monday afternoon!Seeds Have Been Planted in this Childs Life! Seeds from Last Sunday, Seeds that ever Since he has Been going to our Church with us!Those will Grow and Change him eventually! God doesnt ever Give up chasing us and Its not up to us to Save Him! Thats God's Job! We Need(i need) to get out of the way and let him do it!

I Know that God has a Plan for Everything! and He WILL use this Choice Brandon has Made for His Good and the Good of our Family. Even Though I was Really Angry and Bitter When this happened, I am determined to Continue to Pray for him and One day, he will see the things he has done, and he will be a Better person for it! That is my Prayer. I Totally Believe that God uses things(struggles) in our lives to Make us the Person he calls Us to be!

Sunday, February 1, 2009

God's Moving! YEAH!

WOW! Today was an AWESOME day @ my Church today! My 16 yr old Step son was REALLY touched by the Guest Speaker! This is a Child that has Really been becoming the Prodigal son. He has been going down the wrong road and Getting into trouble with Drugs, Drinking,Sex,and been in trouble with the law. Part of the Message today was ALMOST EXACTLY what i blogged about on the 28Th! That excites me!!! Confirmation! I LOVE IT! I love the Way God works sometimes!!!!I had my Women's Group Pray for him on Tuesday because the situation was just getting so BAD! I love Answered Prayer!!!! YEAH! :) I am Just praying now that the seed that was Planted Today is NOT STOLEN! :) Those of you that pray.. That is what i ask that you Pray for Concerning Brandon.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Authenticity Part Deux Or Being a Messy Christian

Its Kinda funny,not funny ha ha! but Ironically funny when there is something that i feel God is really trying to Really Get across to me. I see the particular Topic on TV, in things i read,My Pastor preaches a Sermon on it,and it just comes up over and over! That is how i know that is something God is Going "Psst, Check this out!"to me on. Being Authentic is one of those things.

Authenticity is define in the dictonary as : being true to ones personality, spirit, or character

There is other synonyms that are related:authentic:means being actually and exactly what is claimed.Implies being fully trustworthy as according with fact, it can also stress painstaking or faithful imitation of an original
implies good faith and sincerity of intention

My goal is to strive to be an Authentic Christian! I really Feel that If we are going to reach people, then they need to see that We are Authentic! People also want to see Christians that Are Not Trying to Act like they have it all together! that we are people that DO have issues and are Just like them, but, they have this AWESOME Relationship with Christ and BECAUSE of that relationship, they can Love others, and Get over these ISSUES, and Share that with other people, people that really truly NEED God's Grace and Forgiveness in their lives, Because We CANT do it outside of a Relationship with Christ. I have heard the term of " Messy Christianity" and That is SO what the cry of my Heart is . To be a Messy Christian. Jesus Died FOR EVERYONE! He wants ALL to be saved, and come to repentance. Not Just people that think they have it all together,and have no issues! EVERYONE! There is a Book called
Messy Spirituality by a Person called Mike Yaconelli if you want to check this out more!
He talks about What i am talking about! If People see us being Real about ourselves, and our Issues and see us loving them and each other in a NON-judgmental way, I think that is something that will DO AMAZING things for the Kingdom!
There is Other Bloggers that Are all about this! Here!Ragamuffinsoul.com
I love This GUYS Blog!
Him and some other Christian Bloggers
flowerdust.com and Prodigal Jon

They going to be having a Conference type meeting that is Sponsered by Catalyst, called "off the Blog"

I really would like to go to this! I am making this a matter of prayer, Because This is something i REALLY feel called to be and do!

Sunday, January 25, 2009

Darn Busy Weekend!

I SO wanted to blog this weekend! But, here it is 10:00pm on sunday night and did i get a chance? NOPE! my weekend flew by! :::::::::::WOOOSH::::::::::: * sigh* maybe tommorrow! I have got ALOT to say! But i Am WAY too Tired to get into it! Stay tuned!

Friday, January 16, 2009

My Goals for 2009, Vision mapping/ The Shack

I have Just started Going to a Group that meets at my Church. It is a Women's Group that Helps Women deal with Life Issues, so that they can Be free from those issues, Get out of Gods way, So he can develop them Into the Women He has Called them to BE! I have really Felt Led to Go to these meetings, and, I heard that they were doing the Study Boundaries, So i decided to give it a try!

My first time there was last Tuesday. Only I found out that they were not doing the study that night, Instead they are having a Guest Speaker that night. This Speaker was going to Speak on Journaling! I love it! this is something that i have started doing on my own! Now, i guess i don't do it in the conventional sense,but, Blogging IS still Journaling weather its in a Regular Journal, Or an electronic one. I really Felt like this is Definitely a Confirmation of the Direction i have been feeling that God wants me to go in! YAY!

I don't have ANY problem with people seeing this Journey of self discovery/ Spiritual Growth of mine that i will be Blogging about from time to time, I want to live a Life that is REAL and Authentic For God! I Am totally DONE putting on a Show/ Mask for People! Anyway, As the Speaker was talking, She seem to Hit on ALOT of the topics that i have been Dealing with On my own! I take that as confirmation that i am on the right track!:) She as she talked about Journaling and vision mapping, she asked each one of us what our strengths were. When she came to me, My mind went blank and all i could think of was the gift of encouragement. But, i was acting out of self conscious when i said that because unlike some of the other women there i actually KNOW my strengths! I really enjoyed listening to her and when she talked about vision mapping( which is actually a way of Putting your goals for that year on paper) I at first thought" I don't have a clue about what those are?" But, as i listened and thought about my strengths, I realized that there ARE things that Are goals i have in Mind for this year. This is what i have come Up with so far:

1. Dealing with/relating with my kids better, more effectively. You know, as i typed this, and i reflect on my Performance review@ work yesterday( another Blog post) I want ALL to Improve ALL of my interpersonal relationship skills, and Learn to relate with all people more effectively.

2.Growing With my Husband in our Marriage:( He's an AWESOME Godly man!)
A. Spiritually
C Financially

3.Continuing to Develop Myself into the Person God wants me to Be! there is a reason that i have had all this Growth and development and i really believe its for:

4. Refining and Developing my Ministry. God has Given me a Specific Purpose (Jeremiah 29:11!!) ( like he has everyone!) But, i have recently zeroed in and become aware of what God has called me to do! ITS awesome that I finally know! My Goal in this area is to move in the direction that i Feel called to, continue to be open to God's leading as this is taking shape:) I Don't want to do the leading in this, and become Locked in to MY idea of what it should be, but, i want to Let God direct it!

I just have finished reading The Shack WHOA! This is a POWERFUL Book! i am going to have to re-read it because its so Good! Now i know that this is a Work of fiction, and not a Theological textbook, but alot of the Ideas and things that are in this book made me go hmmmm.. I never thought of that, in that way before! I Totally Think that this Book in my Life at this time was a Divine appointment for me! If you want to See more, or find out more about this book! go to www.theshackbook.com There you can Find a WHOLE lot more about it and decide if this book is for you! I guarantee you wont be disappointed!

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

The Ultimate Gift

Last night I went to a Women's function at our Church that we have there Called Girlfriends Unlimited. They have groups that have games, a Chance to watch a movie together, Play games, do Crafts, Or discuss a Book that the Group has decided to discuss that you decide on the month before, you Read the Book and come the following month to discuss it. Well, i Picked the Movie, which is called Flicker Chicks! The movie we watched was called The Ultimate Gift. I love this movie from the first time i saw it! But, last night as i was watching it,I got more than i didn't the other times i watched it, and i really felt the need to Blog about it.

If you haven't seen this movie, it is about a Young man that Has always been a Trust Fund Baby, and has never had to work a day In his life. Well, The Grandfather Dies and the entire family, that is like him, Attends the funeral,One of Man sons, mentions, " I wonder who he Paid to get it to rain today?" which is pretty much the tone of the ENTIRE family. The day of reading of the will comes and the whole family is there.. waiting for what is OWED them. One by one they get what the Rich man left them, much to many of their dismay. They are told when they are told what their part of the Inheritance is, they have to leave. So, one by one they leave, and then the Grandson strolls in almost at the end of the reading of the will and his mother says, your late! for nothing!
The Grandson rolls his eyes and turns around to leave, and then the executor of the will says, Jason, you wont know for sure, if you don't stick around to find out! So he does, But its not what he's expecting! This Begins a Journey for Jason that his grand father tells him ( thru previously recorded clips) that he is leaving him a series of Gifts leading up to one "Ultimate Gift" if he messes up, and doesn't follow them and complete them exactly as he's set forth, that's it! hes done!and he gets nothing! Jason, reluctantly Begins this Journey, But along the way he learns ALOT who he is as a Person, that Totally challenges and Changes who he is. These Gifts are:

The Gift Of Work: Learning the Value of a Job well done and Doing things for the Right reasons." he who loves his work never labors"- The Ultimate Gift website

The Gift of Problems: ( excerpt taken from The Ultimate Gift Website)
In The Ultimate Gift, Red Stevens recalls, "One of the great errors in my life was sheltering many people from life’s problems. If we are not allowed to deal with small problems, we will be destroyed by slightly larger ones." We each have problems of all sizes in our lives, but it’s the spirit in which we greet them that truly determines their magnitude. Whoa! That's HUGE! As i read that, I realized that that has been one of MY failings as a Parent! But, in order for Us for our kids to Function on their own it is Necessary! THAT is HUGE for me.

The Gift of Friends : Jason learns In this Gift the Value of True friendship and and he learns that once he didn't have money( which his Grandfather arranged before his death for him to be cut off in this second Gift) He didn't have any friends, even his Girlfriend deserts him. He meets Emily and her mother who's Idea of friendship is Different. It is based on Not what the person can do for them, but, the relationship themselves, and they accept people based on who they are not what they can do for them.

The Gift of Giving:
(Excerpt taken from the Ultimate gift website) "Conventional wisdom would say that the less you give, the more you have. The converse is true. The more you give, the more you have. Abundance creates the ability to give; giving creates abundance. This principle is true in every area of your life." when Jason has to take the Money he has earned and find someone that needs it more, he learns that there is More to life than just focusing in himself and his needs.

The Gift of Gratitude: Its important for us to be A grateful people. to take the time to let the People that are close to us know how much we appreciate them on a regular basis.

The Gift of Family:( excerpt Taken from The Ultimate gift website)Families are like vitamins for the soul. They give us strength, they help us heal, and they build immunities against the outside forces that can hurt us. Today, as you enjoy your weekend, reflect on what your family means to you. Also think of the activities, experiences and values that help connect your family. I think that i will pursue getting my whole family to do a Study on this, I really feel that this is the Missing Piece that my Kids are lacking... Hopefully, them seeing these gifts( lessons) a Light bulb will come on in their Brains, like it is for me writing this blog.

The Gift of Laughter: ( excerpt taken from The Ultimate Gift Website)Happy people generally have a positive, joyful outlook on life. They tend to look for and think about the positive aspects of people, things, situations, and events. They can laugh at themselves and brush off little setbacks that others will brood over for days. Even in our saddest moments, laughter can be the best medicine to heal our heart and mend our minds. Start a healthy family habit that will help everyone develop a more positive outlook on life. Make the dinner hour, when you are all together, a time to share with each other the best part of your day. Take turns and really listen. This simple ritual expresses a lot about who we are and what makes us happy. Use the Joy Chart to stimulate some healthy competition. Anyone who can think of three or more good things that happened to them that day earns a happy face on the chart. Whoever has the most happy faces by their name wins the best prize of all: a life full of joy and all the good things that come to someone who looks for them!This is Another Huge thing that i Really WANT my family to start doing. We really need to become Intentionally positive people, Looking for the Good in Each other and Encouraging the Strengths, and forgive the weaknesses.

The Gift of Learning: Education is a lifelong Journey who's destination expands as you travel- The Ultimate Gift website.

The Gift of a Day: In this Lesson Jason learns that happiness in life isn't about getting things, but, its about what you give away to others. Realizing that life is Precious and it isn't about what you are given in life, but what you give, and do for others, Especially Love.

The Gift of Love: ( excerpt taken from The Ultimate Gift Website)
One of the most precious gifts you can give someone you love is your time, especially in today’s busy world. When was the last time you invited your spouse out to dinner or took your mother to lunch? Can you imagine how special it would be if you invited your daughter on a ‘date’ where you help teach her how a man should treat a lady? Or how about planning a fishing trip with your grandson - just the two of you? Couples need to make time for their relationship to keep their love alive and strong. And children crave the one-on-one time that makes them feel cherished. None of us, no matter what our age, ever outgrows the need to feel loved and appreciated.
This one is SO true and something we Try to do on a regular basis, both as a couple and as a family.

The Gift of a Dream: { excerpt taken from The Ultimate Gift website)
Dreams are an important part of who we are as individuals. The ability to dream and believe in a dream is the foundation for success in every aspect of life. People who accomplish great things all begin with a dream, while those who don’t chase their dream are often disappointed. When we allow the Gift of Dreams into our lives and summon the courage to follow our dreams, we begin to experience life at its fullest. The key to making dreams come true is making them real. This means putting your dreams down on paper, sharing them with others and actually planning the steps you can take to move closer to making your dreams come true. In the Movie Jason takes the Money he is given by his Grandfather and uses ALL of it to get a Bunch of his grandfathers associates to build a Place adjacent to the hospital for Parents Of terminally ill kids to live, work and take care of themselves and the rest of the family while their kids are being treated at the hospital.

The Gift of Money (Also the Gift of love): Because he gave ALL of the 100 million dollars that was first given to him, to one thing all at once . His grandfathers Executor/ friend tells him he how proud he is of him and the man hes become, and that he needs him to come by the office, he has something to share with him. Jason goes and he brings out one last video.Its his grandfather telling him how much he loves him and that if he's watching this video its because he's given the entire hundred million away to charity, and that he has completed ALL of the Gifts above and beyond whats been asked of him, and then he says How hes accomplished all that he's ever wished for him and now he knows that while his grandson is alive, his legacy will live on thru him. then executor opens a final box and reads from another codicil of his will that he has left Jason the Bulk of the estate estimated at a value of over 2 billion dollars.

Now to me, I don't consider the fact that he inherited the bulk of his grandfathers estate to be the Ultimate Gift. I consider that the lessons that he learned from those gifts, that gave him the Strength of Character that he had at the End of the movie, making him the Man he Became, THAT was the Ultimate Gift! And that is the Gift i wish to give my kids, and that is the Person i desire to be most!

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Kids and Other things that make you SCREAM!

What is it exactly, that makes kids( teens in my case)Tune you totally out and not hear you at all when you ask them to not do something( fidgeting, drumming on walls, counters, body parts, etc..) or to do something( chores, or any other simple task that they are asked to do). I mean, i ask really nicely the first time, then, when i am ignored, ( which is usually the case). I ask again, hopping to be heard! them usually bye the 20,000Th time! ( OK, i lied,its not that much!) but, bye the 3 or forth time, I get tired of being IGNORED and get really irritated and lose it! OH then they hear me and look at me like i have Grown 2 heads and have lost my mind! WHAT THE HECK??? what is it in them that chronologically does not hear me??? I don't get it! i know each of them understands the frustration of not being listened to, and having your wishes totally disregarded!! I don't understand how its any different for me!!! I really don't think i ask TOO awful Much of them... I really don't! I expect them to Clean up after themselves and to take turns doing the dishes. There are kids is ALOT WORSE situations! So why the Hassle???My 14 yr old dsd had been getting up and taking initiative and doing them on her own without having to be asked and i LOVED that! We even rewarded her because we thought 1. it would motivate the other kids to action, and 2. we knew she was doing it for the right reason. she hasn't volunteered to do any chores lately, now i understand that being the only one doing it on their own all the time gets old , but totally stopping to do stuff doesn't help her either. The other kids... not so much...My 11 yr old Dss HAS done it once in a while on his own.. while My Biological offspring.. 13and 16 yr old it takes an act of congress to get them to do them, the 13 yr old will do it sometimes when asked, but she doesn't ever complete the task! My 16 yr old fights tooth and nail and drags it out into a BIG HUGE deal! I really do love ALL of these Kids, and i want us to have fun, but BOY OH BOY.. do they frustrate me!!!

1.I have asked them to check in the laundry room once a day for their clothes, yet they sit down there for days on end!!
2.I ask them if they are going to do their own laundry( which is something else i just realized they are EXPECTED to do.oops!) i ask that they don't just leave it in the washer and expect the magic laundry fairy
( me!) to come Finnish it for them!
3. I ask them to Please not sit in the living room and have a loud conversation while someone( usually me, they don't dare it with their dad!) is trying to watch a show!

The list goes on and on.. and right now i am REALLY FRUSTRATED with all of them.. because they arn't doing anything i have asked and asked them NOT to do.!Or the things i have asked them to do, i have to remind and remind. They just don't seem to understand that once i am frustrated because i haven't been listened to for all of these various reasons, .. frustration BUILDS! Anyone has their breaking point and I just cant understand why they cant see that its because they DON'T listen to me! and then i have to deal with the Various Attitude that they throw MY way because I get angry!Now, don't get me wrong, these kids are ALL GREAT KIDS! even my 11yr dss, that STILL has a Problem with me being in authority over him, and cant seem to follow even the SMALLEST direction, and has many times done what he has wanted to do anyway, regardless of what i( or anyone else) says( but there are other influences coming into play in this case also! ) . I just hope this is something that is just a phase, however, i even despair of that because, i had a really nice conversation with my DSD by text last week.. and it really seemed like we connected, and she understood me, and i really felt we got somewhere! But now i feel like either she didn't remember it, or we didn't connect on the level i thought we did because now shes acting like it never happened, and were back to square one.
* SIGH* Well, I guess this Just Comes with the territory, but, I wish i could get a little understanding from the other side.. These Kids are NOT small Children, and they SHOULD understand, but, like my hubby Frequently tells me, Maybe i am expecting them to Be little adults. Who knows..

Thursday, January 8, 2009

God Reveals a little Bit more

My General Manager Handed me a Paper the Other day for me to fill out in order for her to give me my Evaluation for my Work performance. On that Paper it Listed It had 5 Strengths listed in numerical order.

1. Developing myself
2.Interacting with Children
3.Inspiring People to Take action
4.Being in the Middle of the action

We came to this Being my 5 Main strengths using cards that sort the things that you like most to do and narrowing them down to these 5 Strengths.

Directly below these Strengths was this Question: How am i currently Using these Strengths here at Chick-fil-a? Now i have REALLY Grown to HATE these kinds of questions, mainly because i couldn't for the life of me Figure out what to say or how to describe it. But since i have been treating my ADD its been SO much easier to Express myself on paper or verbally. So, after Getting a little Brain storming with my hubby i figured out what direction i wanted to take in answering these questions. this is what i put for each one.

Developing myself- I have been Using this Strength By Learning More about myself. Finding out what my weaknesses are and where my Strengths lie. Learning about Healthy Boundaries,and becoming aware of areas in my life where I don't have healthy boundaries and learning how to establish them.
Becoming more aware of My worth in God's Eyes and not basing my opinion of myself ( or whether I am doing a good job or a Bad Job based on the leaders emotions!) and Most of all learning to confront issues that I have with others without Dissolving into a puddle of tears because of Fear or Rejection!

Interacting with Children-Noticing that Kids are People( customers) Too! I am using this to assist kids on the front line, and, in the Dining room where they might be overlooked. Kids are Important as well, because their Parents are the Main customers, and if the Kids are Recognized as having value as a customer then the parents are that much more inclined to want to come back.

Inspiring People to Take action- By Learning the Qualities of a Person of Influence. By Being the Example for Other People to Follow all the Time no matter what other people are doing or are not doing. By Doing The things that No one Else will do. By Adding Value to my Team members and leaders.

Being in the Middle of the action- I am always looking for what I can do, if, for instance its slow and there isn't any customers to be helped, I can always find something that needs to be done. I Love to Pitch in and help where people need assistance. My Heart is to Serve that is my Main calling/ gifting / Talent.

Coaching- Helping New Team Members with learning how to do The Job, being there to support and encourage. I am learning to do this in a More Constructive way that encourages and Empowers the New team members. This is a Strength that thru Self discovery, I am realizing that I am not as Strong at this one than the other ones. Maybe a better explanation of it is I misunderstood what this Looked like and that is changing as I Grow Personally and spiritually.. Encouraging is also one of my areas of Gifting so I know that is still a strength. There is Another question after that asks:

"How can i Use these Talents in the next six months?
I answered each of them individually like this:
Developing myself: Continuing to Grow in the areas I have and finding new areas in which to grow. Having my Priorities In the Correct order. Pursuing a Correct Work/ Life Balance that allows me to Give My family my Best and Chick-Fil-A my best , in a way that Ultimately Glorifies and Honors God. Being the Person that thinks( problem solves) for themselves and Helps the Leadership by Not being the Person that they Dont have to Supervise constantly. My overall Goal is to Become the Person of Influence that God has called me to be.
Interacting with Children: making Sure Kids are valued as customers just like the adults. Improving my focus on that.

Inspiring others to take Action: Developing and becoming the Person of Influence that God has Called me to Be, that Encourages and Equips my coworkers / family to be their Best. Focusing on Team building rather than Self Accomplishment.

Coaching: Continuing to learn about Building up new workers and Encouraging Good ( second mile effort) and also encouraging those struggling in that. To help leadership foster a Positive Motivating environment that brings out the best in others. Being a person of Influence!

As I wrote this I realized that This is something that applies to EVERY area of my life! With my family, with the Ministries i am Involved with at Church, and at work. It made me realize that this is WHO i want to be ALL the time! A Person of Influence! The Person who's life Ultimatly Glorifies God. Because, that, My friends is the Bottom line.

Sunday, January 4, 2009

Getting Life Back to normal

As i sit wondering what i should Blog about today, I am reflecting back on this Holiday Season! What a Busy Time! I am really Glad Things are getting back to normal and Back to our routine. I took my Son Back home yesterday:( I am Still really Tired from that and Staying up yesterday to watch the Colts Play( grrrr!). Now i can Focus on Moving forward with What i Feel that God Calling me Towards, My purpose, so to speak. I still Don't feel that its totally Taken Shape yet, But i do at least Know In which direction to move, Which i think is a Good thing, considering I didnt even know weeks ago. I was Moving in a total other direction and was getting frustrated because it wasn't working! (DUH!) no wonder! Anyway, I really think that God gives us a little Bit of it, a direction, and then sees what we do with it , or where we go with it and directs us from there. I am Really Excited to see what all unfolds for Me and my Family and my Church family! This is an Exciting time!